Mankind, this is Gandolf the White, and I bring you greetings from the lands of Middle Earth. As the President of Wizard Affairs I have sworn my allegiance to the Washington Wizard’s…but I would rather eat at Taco Bueno for 10,000 years than to support that defilement and defamation of character, so I made the switch. Lately, I’ve been super busy taming nazgûl [think python meets tiger but the size of a whale, with the attitude of a wolverine and teeth like “Yuck Mouth”] for our annual Elrond [basically a circus] and my old bat of-a wife keeps complaining that my Black Berry is going Khazad-dûm [basically krazy] and if I don’t shut it up, she’s going to sing like Marry J Blige and Keyshia Cole put together. [(((Yikes)))] So I dassssshed inside to prevent this travesty, grabbed my phone, to find that I keep getting tweets from ex-Magic carpet riders that are buying tickets to the “Laker Show.” What the Parth Galen is a “Laker” anyway!? Spell check doesn’t know! They should be called the Fakers! because they yell when they want the ref to blow the whistle.
I digress.
You know, I’ve broken the “Do not intervene in Mankind affairs” rule over and over again, which could, by the way, cost me my Wizardship, JUST to keep things interesting this season and ya’ll still flip flop. I hate that (profane)!!!!
Down 2-1 to the Philadelphia 76ers, and the hot dog sales went right out the door with the fans. Trailing 3-2 against the Celtics, all hope was thought to be lost because Boston was a perfect 32-0 in the postseason when it possessed such an advantage. The Magic couldn't break history, right? You doubters foolishly left in droves. Burned at the buzzer by LeBron James [quite a handsome young man might I add; we Black Berry Messenger on Thursday nights] in Game 2 of the Eastern Conference Finals, the panic-stricken once again jumped ship, lacking faith that the Magic could overcome such a heartbreaking defeat. But what happened? And now, after a 101-96 Game 2 overtime road defeat put them in a 2-0 Finals hole to the “Faker Show”, and all of the sudden people don’t wanna believe in Magic.
Phil Jackson is 43-0 when his teams win the first game of the finals series, SO WHAT! The GOAT just passed Frank Ramsey into 19th place on the all time Finals scoring list, SO WHAT! Lee miss one of the biggest lay ups of his life, SO WHAT!
News flash, the Magic has been down this road already! "We were down to Philadelphia 2-1 and were down to the Boston Celtics and went on to win the series," said Magic All-Star forward Rashard Lewis, who exploded for 34 points on Sunday. "This is nothing new for us."
Although a 2-0 disadvantage can discourage even the most faithful fan, based on the setup of the NBA's postseason schedule, the series is statistically exactly where it's supposed to be.
"The Lakers did a good job of protecting their home and now it's our turn to do the same thing," Dwight Howard explained. "We've been in some tough situations, we've just got to fight our way out."
The Magic won’t be the first team to execute such a comeback.
In NBA history, three other squads battled back from the same Finals deficit: the 1969 Celtics, 1977 Blazers and 2006 Heat.
And the Magic are going to be the fourth.
"I was still in Miami in 2006 when they lost both games in Dallas and then were way down in the third quarter in Game 3 at home, came back and won that one and Dallas never won another game," Stan Van Gundy explained. "You know a series can change. You've got to take it one game at a time."
The Magic will take the first step on Tuesday at 9 p.m. ET on ABC. Well, its Uruk-hai [basically breakfast time] and I’m starved.
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